relaxed
For some reason I've always thought of Martha as "an older woman", but in fact she was born only a year before her famous (and second) husband. She was born on June 2, 1731 on Chestnut Grove Plantation, in New Kent County, Virginia. Her father John Dandridge emigrated from England to Virginia in 1715. He was a planter who also served as clerk of New Kent County. Martha's mother was Frances Jones. She was born in York County, Virginia, and married John Dandridge in 1730. Martha was the eldest child of a family of nine. She had three brothers and five sisters. She also had an illegitimate half-sister (date of birth unrecorded) Ann Dandridge Costin, who was a slave. Anne was one-quarter African, one-quarter Cherokee Indian and half-white. Martha is also believed to have had an illegitimate half-brother Ralph Dandridge (date of birth unrecorded), who was probably caucasian.
In contrast to her tall second husband, Martha was under five feet tall. She had dark brown hair. Martha was a member of the Church of England. She received an informal education at home where she was trained in music, sewing, household and plantation management, crop sales, homeopathic medicine, and animal husbandry. She was probably taught by indentured Dandridge family servant Thomas Leonard, and regularly tutored for about five years until the age of 12 or 13 at Poplar Grove Plantation, the home of a friend of the Chamberlayne family.
Martha was a widow when she married George Washington. Her first marriage took place when she was 19 years old in 1850. She married Daniel Parke Custis, manager of the New Kent County plantation of his father Councilor John Custis of Williamsburg. They lived at a mansion called "White House," on the Pumunkey River. Her first husband was twenty years her senior. Daniel Custus died seven years later when Martha was 26. By then she had four children, two of whom died very young and two who lived to adulthood: Daniel Parke Custis (1751–1754), Frances Parke Custis (1753–1757), John Parke "Jacky" Custis (1754–1781), Martha Parke "Patsy" Custis (1756–1773). By then she had considerable power through her wealth and privileged social status. Letters she wrote to the London merchants who handled the exporting of the large Custis crop output suggests that she was a good business person.
On January 6, 1759 when Martha was 27 years old, she married Colonel George Washington, then the commander of the First Virginia Regiment in the French and Indian War, and a former member of the House of Burgess, Frederick County. They were married at "White House" but lived at the estate known as "Mount Vernon," initially leased from his half-brother Lawrence's widow, and inherited upon her death in 1761. Martha had no children with George Washington, but she raised two grandchildren: George Washington Parke Custis (1781-1857), known as "Wash", and Eleanor "Nelly" Parke Custis (1779-1852).
Martha inherited a very large parcel of land from the Custis estate. With her husband's absenses both as soldier and president, she managed this land as well as the vast farming enterprise at Mount Vernon. She spent considerable time directing the large staff of slaves and servants. While George Washington oversaw all financial transactions related to the plantation, Martha was responsible for the harvesting, preparing, and preserving herbs, vegetables, fruits, meats, and dairy for medicines, household products and foods needed for those who lived at Mount Vernon, relatives, slaves and servants.
During the American Revolution, Martha Washington assumed a prominent role as caretaker for her husband, who had been appointed the General of the American Army by the Continental Congress, and for his troops. She was with the army in the winter of 1775 at Cambridge, Massachusetts; the spring of 1776 at New York, the spring of 1777 at Morristown, New Jersey, and the winter of 1778 at Valley Forge, Pennsylvania. She lent her name to support a formal effort to enlist women of the colonies to volunteer on behalf of the Continental Army. In appreciation, American servicemen addressed her as "Lady Washington."
Much is unknown about the true nature of her relationship with George Washington since she burned all the correspondence she had between them just prior to her death. Since George Washington was unanimously named President, there were no election campaigns to take part in. She was unable to attend his April 30, 1789 inaugural ceremony in the first capital city of New York, but she followed the route traveled by him a month earlier. She was honored as "Lady Washington" in a ceremony and procession by local citizen groups. She was present for her husband's second inaugural on March 4, 1793 in Philadelphia but took no public role in the ceremonies.
Martha Washington's told friends in letters that her eight years as the first First Lady were extremely unpleasant to her personally, but she viewed it as a duty owed to her husband and to her country. By the time she arrived at the capital, her husband's secretary had created a series of rigid protocol rules that she found especially limiting, particularly the one which forbade her and the President from accepting invitations to dine in private homes. Despite the company of her two grandchildren, she expressed a sense of loneliness in New York, the first capital, where she had fewer personal friends than she would find in the next capital of Philadelphia (1790-1800). She was distressed that even her mundane activities like shopping or taking her grandchildren to the circus, were recorded by the press.
Establishing her public role as hostess in the series of presidential mansions in New York and Philadelphia, Martha Washington held formal dinners on Thursdays and public receptions on Fridays. No evidence suggests what or if she sought to influence any of the President's decisions, but she is believed to have been a strong supporter of the Federalist Party. Newspapers of the Anti-Federalist Party criticized the formality of her receptions as evoking the royal court of the British monarchy, against which the American Revolution had been fought. She remained beloved by Revolutionary War veterans, and was publicly known to provide financial support or to intercede on behalf of those in need. Some Americans as well as some Europeans sent her lavish gifts. One British engraver even sought to capture her image and sell it to the mass public, creating a picture that looked nothing like her but was labeled "Lady Washington."
After George Washington underwent the surgical removal of a possibly cancerous growth on his left side in 1789, Martha Washington made arrangements to mitigate the pain of his post-surgical recovery, ensuring that the public streets near their home were cordoned off and straw laid nearby to muffle sounds.
Martha Washington was relieved when her husband's Administration ended. The couple retired to Mount Vernon. Upon his death on December 14, 1799, the slaves owned by the Washingtons were promised their freedom upon Martha Washington's death. Making clear the tremendous personal sacrifice that the federal government asked of her in requesting that she permit the remains of the first president to be eventually interned at the U.S. Capitol Building, she wrote to President John Adams that she would acquiesce with her sense of public duty. Although she curtailed her life to Mount Vernon, once the new capital city was established in what was first called, "The Federal City," and then named for her late husband, Martha Washington welcomed political figures who came to pay their respects to her and visit what was then thought to be the temporary burial place of the late president. She expressed her loneliness for her late husband frequently and her desire to soon join him in death.
Martha Washington died at her home in Mount Vernon, Virginia on May 22, 1802. She was 70 years old. She is buried at her home in Mount Vernon, Virginia.